Ask Insane Dipper
by Forestspirit of Thunderclan
Summary: I'm doing for the most part becasue i am board. So yeah, send in Ask and/or dares please. And also, if your a flamer you will be ignored and used to bake my drugged cupcakes. *Twitches* *Smirks*
1. Chapter 1 Intro!

**I Don't Own Gravity Falls**

**Okay so I'm doing this because I'm bored out of my mind. Also anyone who says this is against the 'rules' will be ignored for the most part. So save your breath for someone who does care.**

**ASK INSANE DIPPER**

**Dipper: **Alright women and guys, I'm here because Forest is forcing me to do this. So Dares are welcome, but remember this is a 'Ask' fanfic.

**Me: **You should be more nicer, and explained who you are!

**Dipper: ***Mutters* Like I care... *Sighs* I'm Bill Ciphers 'Proxy' or 'Apprentice' at the most. I wear a black hoodies with a blue pine tree on it, dark blue jeans and gold shoes with a red and black cap, with a triangle where the pine tree was. I also go by the name Pine Tree, or Red Pine.

**Me: **Sorry for his dull tone...*Glares at him*

**Dipper: **-_- Can I go kill now?

**Me: **No! YOu are to stay here and start the first few from my friends who inspired this fanfiction.

**Dipper: ***Sighs* Let's just get this over.

**Me**: **Animation101** asked,

**Animation101**: **ACT NORMAL. GO HOME. TELL BILL TO F OFF**

**Dipper: ***Glares* You act Flippin un-normal! You go home and kill your family! And you do that you baka!

**Me**: Isn't he nice... *Sweatdrips* Uh...Next!

**Dipper**: Idiot...

**Me: ***Grins* Okay, This one is from my friend **Fangirlhappiness77**. (Other helped out in this idea in my mine was BillCipher5 but he's got nothing at this moment) She has asked you to...

**Dipper: ***Curiosity Peaks* Yes?

**Me: **Go on a Killing Spree with Bill.

**Dipper: **YES! I get out of here early! *Runs out the door at sonic speed*

**Me: **I will get you back here! And he'll possible come back with a lot of blood on him and more insane than normal. Please send in ASK and/or Dares!

**Dipper: **Time to Kill! *Laughs insanely*

**Me**: NOOOOO NOT MY CAT! *Runs out after him*


	2. Chapter 2 Dipper is Guilty

**I Don't Gravity Falls**

**Dipper is Guilty**

**Me: **Okay, let's just get started!

**Dipper: ***Coughs* Just hurry up, I have to go kill Stan soon

**Me: **Uhhh, I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that.

**Dipper: **Probably best you should *Smiles insanely*

**Me: **Okay, first one is frown **BillCipher5**

**BillCipher5: **Hey Insane Dip Go to my school and kill the principle. I'll give my appendix.

**Dipper: ***Already has him* *Holding a bloody Knife* Huh? Too late, he was on the list...And I only eat Kidneys or Souls.

**Me: **O_O Uhhhhhh, okay I really needed to lock up your weapons.

**Dipper: ***petting his knife* *Hisses at me* Mine! My precious!

**Me:** This took an awkward turn, next one is from **A-Plus Cassiopeia **

**A-Plus Cassiopeia:** Uuuhhhh...

**Dipper: **Problems? -_-

**A-Plus Cassiopeia:** *Stares at him*

**Me: **Yeah, he's gone off the deep end. *Giggles*

**Dipper: ***Grins in mouth guard* Your so lucky I can't kill you.

**Me: **SIT BOY!

**Dipper: **W-What! *necklace glows* *Lands face first on the ground*

**Me: **Ha! I knew watching Inuyasha would come in handy!

**Dipper: **Give give me the next question *Groans* *Blows hair out of face*

**Me: **This one is from **wizard101**

**wizard101: **Hey Dipper, a lot of people here like to ship you and Bill together. How does this make you feel? (I think it's CUTE! :3)

**Dipper: **I've heard, but I haven't read one. *Goes to computer*

**Me: ***Watches closely*

**Dipper: **Okay, Google... 'BillXDipper Gravity Falls'

*Pause*

**Dipper: ***Blinks* O_o Ooooohhhhh boy...

*Later* *After reading one*

**Dipper: ***Smirks* *Sing song tone* Guilty...

**Me: **O_O Welllllllll, we'll be waiting for more, while I check and see if he's gay or not. *Tackles Dipper*

**Dipper: **GET OFF! *Stabs at me*

*Screen goes colorful* *Loud 'beep' sound* *'technical difficulties'*


	3. Chapter 3 Killing and Kidneys

**I Don't Own Gravity Falls**

**Killing and Kidneys**

**Me: **Whoo! 6 people! Thanks everyone!

**Dipper: ***Claps* I hope this is good.

**Me: ***Smiles* Okay first up is **The master ship!**

**TMS: ** dare you to go on a date with HUMAN twilight sparkle, lisa Simpson, double d, and wirt. (my little pony, the Simpsons, Ed edd n eddy, and over the garden wall) and you can't kill anyone any more.

**Dipper: ***Laughs* I'll do the first and last one, the other two I've already tried and I almost killed them...

**Me: **-_- Really? Okay, Twilight!

**Twilight: **Hi! I'm Twilight Sparkle! *Smiles*

**Dipper: **Oh Crap...

*Later*

**Dipper: **Well she's okay, possible might be a friend.

**Me: ***Blinks* She's not dead, wow, okay Writ!

*silence*

**Dipper; **I think he's in the closet *Opens it*

**Me: ***Hears a girly scream* *Shouting* *then a loud crash* Uh...Hello?

**Dipper: ***Muttering* call me a pushover, say I'm too violent...hehehhehe, oh I showed him. *Covered in Blood.*

**Me: ***Sweatdrip* Let's keep going.

**Dipper: **HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! Like I have a choice TMS, my master says I have to.

**Me: **You are a pushover...

*Is stabbed*

**Me: **Huh...*Looks at knife blankly.* next is, **sportsgallol**

**sportsgallol:** I love insanity! That's what makes the world normal don't you agree dipper? Here's a bazooka so you can go cray cray with! *hands dipper a bazooka*

**Dipper: **Yes, I don't really see how people can go on thinking they are not insane, we all have a bit inside of us. Embracing it is the best way to have fun, that's what my master says, but you know. People are wimps at times. *eyes bazooka* *Smirks* I'll be using this later. Thanks you! *Grins in mouth guard*

**Me: **Next is **lydia cipher!**

**lydia cipher: **HI DIPPING-SAUCE. I'M RELATED TO BILL ISN'T THAT GREAT. WE'RE RELATED BECAUSE WE ARE MARRIED. :) ISN'T THAT GREAT. and I killed Stan for you and soos. So in return... KILL MY SISTER PLEASE. And are you goth like Robbie that douch bag? Cause Robbie v is an asshole.

**Dipper: ***Grins widely* HI LYDIA! That's great I'm so happy for both of you! Thanks a lot, they were getting to be so annoying at how good they were at avoiding me. So sure, I'll do that tonight *Smirks*

**Me: **I'd say yes to the last one, he's so mean to me!

**Dipper: **No, I only act like him to get on Forest's nerves *Smirks* And yes...ye she is, actually I think he's next on my masters list for me. *checks*

**Me: **He gave you a list!? O_O

**Dipper: **It's easier *Smiles*

**Me: **Uh...nope, don't question it Forest! Ummmm, next is, **Channel Jumper!**

**Channel Jumper: **Hello Insane Dipper! Why don't we kidnap your sister and orphans and eat their souls? After that, we could lure the police from the incident and eat their kidneys! How's that sound?!

**Dipper: **I have a sister? well, she's my food now...THAT SOUND LIKE AWESOME FUN! You get some weapons and meet me at midnight, let's have some insane fun! *Laughs*

**Me: **Thanks a lot Channel, you just had to get him started *Groans*

**Dipper: ***Smiles* I'm enjoying this now! *Laughs*

**Me: **-_- Next is **Weird cray kid**

**Weird cray kid: **Name' kid, nice to meet cha! Insane Dipper. I ask what's your favourite food besides kidneys? Doritos perhaps? Also kill my best friend's boyfriend for me aye? He's been trash talkin' bout yer master, Bill. Anyway here's a closet full of weapons have fun! CRAY AWAY! *jumps into a blue portal* (Yo author! Keep doing this its crazy fun to read.)

**Dipper: **Hiya! Well, yeah I like Doritos, but my other fav is Cupcakes.

**Me: **YEAH CUPCAKES WITH BLOOD AND FLESH!

**Dipper: **Okay...yeah! *Smiles* Also, he has!? *Eyes go red* I'll do it free of charge Kid...*Laughs coldly*

**Me: ***Hides* Scary...*Shivers*

**Dipper: **Thanks for the weapons friend! *Smiles insanely*

**Me: **Well that's all-

**Dipper: ***Hold sup Bazooka* No, **Animation101 **asked for me to kill you so I will!

**Me: WHAT! **Why friend why!? *Runs*

**Dipper: ***Fires at random* *Laughs* This is for making me do this you -

*BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP*


	4. Chapter 4 We're Back!

**I Don't Own Gravity Falls**

**Chapter 4**

**We're Back!**

**Forest: **Sorry for the long Hiatus everyone, school has been getting to be a drag. Any who where back!

**Dipper: **Oh great *Very sarcastic*

**Forest: ** SIT BOY! *Dipper hits the ground* I'M THE AUTHOR SO YOU WILL LISTEN!

**Dipper: **For now *Glares at me* *Blows bangs out of face*

**Forest: **Anywho, let's get started with, **SaphiraMockingjay**

**SaphiraMockingjay:** Dear Red Pine, 1. Are you a good arsonist? 2. Do you have a kill list? If so, who is on it? 3. What's dragon divided by crazy? Circle.

-Coin

**Dipper:** I Don't normally set fire to things, only when my master lets me. But if I do then I make sure it's in a very enjoying way, I like to watch things burn!

**Forest:** That's why I locked up all the explosives, he's a Pyro! *Shivers*

**Dipper: **Which I hate you for, adding that to the list of things to kill you over. *Glares* Anywho, yes I have a kill list from my Master; there are mostly people from the Cipher Wheel on it, and anyone my Master thinks is trouble. Other then that *Smiles* I have free rain on torture!

**Forest: **And this is why I locked up your weapons and numbed your magic. Yet you still hate me, your insane boy! I have to protect our dear readers from you!

**Dipper: ***Smirks* You don't have to protect all of them *Winks at the readers*

**Forest: **Okay! Anyone above who is listening to me right now, SAVE US ALL!

**Dipper: **All religious are fake, sweet Nightmares!

**Forest: **O_O

**Dipper: ** Dragon divided by Crazy? I hate math, but, Dragon Crazy fan I guess you are *Grins* I would have said Death to all Humans

**Forest: ***Facepalm* Next is **Guest (1)**

**Guest (1): **Hey insane dipper! I got a question: What happened to you? (Author) is it some kind of AU? And back to dipper. Are you sure you're not Ticci toby dressed in dippers clothes? What's your favorite clothes?

-glares at insane dipper-and I'm going to kill you! -tries to kill him, and is badly injured- god dammit! Anyways C ya!

TheOneToEnditAll667

**Dipper:** What happened, well, where to start? *Sighs* I guess it happened right after I was possessed by my Master. I began to feel odd inside, like something was wrong. Lasps of black outs at midnight to 6 in the morning, and Triangles gave me headaches. Then after Mabel betrayed me, I lost all of my sanity, I snapped and then my darker half saved me from death. Bill gave me a second chance, I was his Proxy and in return he'd show me all I was missing. He's not as bad as he seems, *Shrugs* we all have a mask to fool the world.

**Forest: **Any is welcome to right this AU, add in whatever you want, and crap. Just give credit and whatnot.

**Dipper: **I hate you...*Blinks* Ticci Toby, That dudes okay, a little awkward, and no I'm not him, I don't tick or twitch a lot, unless I take my meds that Bill gave me. I just copied his style because it was easier and gave me more of a cooler look *Glares* Why, do you have a problem?

**Forest: **Well, that was off, and no, no she doesn't. *Nervous smile*

**Dipper: ***Sharpens Knife* Possible the ones I'm wearing right now. Orange is a good color though...*Thoughtful* *Taps knife to chin* Anywho *attacks*

**Forest: **Stop breaking things! Mostly people! *Tackles Dipper again*

*Few minuets later of cursing and fighting*

**Dipper: ***Is in a white jacket tied up and in the corner*

**Forest: ***Cleaning up the mess* You see, this is why we can't have nice things! *Sighs* Next is **Guest (2)**

**Guest (2): **Hey Pine tree or prefer as Dead tree. Dead tree suits you more.

A) are you ticci toby in dippers clothes? _((Refer to above))_

B) what happened to your family pine..-glares-

C) you are in a fight with JTHM and JeffTK what would you do (search it up if you don't know)

E) to author: is this a AU? _((Refer to above))_

F) *tries to kill you but is badly injured*

G) kill the entire world if you please, if not then ill torture you.

**Dipper: **Well, my family was mostly killed by my Master. Mabel is locked up in his basement, and my mother and father went off the radar a few days ago. I'm still trying to find them *Taps chin* They always did love Florida...*Grins*

**Forest: **Not right now! Get through with this and then you can go kill your unloving parents *Sighs*

**Dipper: ***Pouts cutely* Fiiiiine! *Sighs annoyed* Johnny is a cool dude! We got into a fight once, I almost won, if EJ didn't distract me! I'm calling for a rematch! *Glares at the ground* *Crosses arms*

**Forest: **Your so cute! XD *Is stabbed* ...Ow...

**Dipper: **Jeff if great! Me and him go on a ton of killing sprees together! I fought him once, but it ended with no winner because Slendy broke us apart and grounded us from killing. *Shrugs* That last for about 3 minuets. If Jeff wants to fight again I'll do it, when my Master gives me time that is *Grumbles*

**Forest: ***Too afraid to comfort him* Okay! Good luck with that *Nervous laugh* *Blinks as **Guest (2)** is hurt.* I told you to stop trying to kill them!

**Dipper: **But Forest!

**Forest: **Not buts! Keep answering!

**Dipper: ***Frowns* Alright! And I won't, becasue I love pain! Seeing other in pain and inflecting it on myself! *Smiles* I think I got that from my Master, Bill. He used to torture me until my pain nerves gave out and I couldn't feel it anymore. It tickles now!

**Forest: **O_O Ooooookaaaaaay. Well, that's all for now guys! I'll try and update as soon as I can. And I'm sorry I couldn't get to the other people, I just woke up and checked my reviews for this. *Sighs*

**Dipper: **Great! I've got some rematches to get to and find my baka parents! *Runs off*

**Forest: **Great, now I have to hunt him down again. Thanks a lot guys! *Gets tazer and net and a BUNCH Tranquilizer for elephants*

*Cam turns off*


End file.
